Sunday, October 2, 2011

Say No To Family Events This Year

As the summer comes to an end, only a few things are constant in the coming future; cold weather and family gatherings. Thanksgiving, Christmas, and New Years Eve. At some point you won't be able to skip that dreaded family event. Uncle Steve will ask for a hundred dollars, your sister in law will have six thousand questions hoping to figure out why her husband is dysfunctional. (if you're lucky) You're Mother and Father are a year older, crankier, more blunt asking constant questions about your job, love life, and health. Stress is at an all time high, you never know what will be said, or what odd behavior will occur to make you think; this is it for me, no more family events. If you feel this way you're not alone, family events are the most stressful times of the year. According to a Harvard Poll done in 1996, it was considered that family gatherings are one of the ten most stressful events. Family can be overbearing, selfish, and most important, oblivious to the turmoil they cause you.

You Can Choose Your Friends but you can't choose your family:

Family is special. Beside being infinitely annoying, they have been around since the beginning of your time. Have known you through all the hard and good times. They attended all of your events,and supported you when you needed that helping hand. That sounds great, but why do they cause so much stress? Why do we continue to participate in these yearly events? We must be masochist or insane. " I absolutely can't stand holidays, because it's ground hog day. I know exactly what's going to happen and the end result. It's never pretty," Says Judy Holmes A New Jersey Homemaker. Why do we feel responsible for engaging ourselves, we know what's going to happen. If you don't go, if you don't entertain these stressful events does this make you less loving or less family oriented? Try telling Mom, that you're not coming over for Thanksgiving because you'd rather sit home with a microwave turkey and watch the game. Conniption is not the word. We feel pushed, manipulated and coerced into attending. What to do.

It's Simple, don't go:

I know that sounds crazy, It's definitely not the PC thing to say. But, don't go! The only way to alleviate the stress of the holidays is to be absent. The problem is people tend to not see their family all year and cram all that time in 2-3 days. If you can possibly set aside some time during the course of the year, spending one on one time with Grandma, taking Dad and Mom out to lunch a couple times a month you won't feel bad about missing the gatherings for Christmas and Thanksgiving. That's what keeps us coming, its guilt. The guilt of not fulfilling family objectives, the guilt of the possibility of never seeing these people again is overbearing. The guilt of feeling disconnected or being looked upon as not being a part of the family is tough to swallow. As the holidays roll around don't feel bad about not going to the family gatherings, just give your time throughout the year and you will be fine. What do you think about this method?

Five Things To Do For the Holidays

Stay Home:

Staying Home is not a bad idea, you get a few days off work why spend that time over eating and listening to rhetoric from all sides of the family.

Take A Trip:

Go on a vacation, rates are never cheaper during the holidays but the most opportune time to take a vacation. Because most have paid time off work, if you accompany your holiday with vacation pay you can create a longer vacation.

Create A Party With Friends:

Invite friends who share your passion, make an event with people that actually don't annoy you.

Go To A Sporting Event:

Nothing makes a better holiday excuse than, "I have front row seats, sideline tickets to the game."


Spend the time working, this sounds counterproductive. Some people do like their jobs, use this time to catch up or figure out new ways to gain that bonus or strategize on how to gain on your competitor. This is an opportune time because you know others are not on the same page.

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